To rest

To rest

But not to sleep

Your eyes go right through to me

I try to drift off

But I can't sleep

I want to have a dream

But I'm not lucid

Or wavering in my demeanor

I'd rather not hear you speak

To bless

And genuflect-

To drink of the holy

In retrospect

Water and oil and myhrr

I have no shame or regret

But nothing can stop this upset

I close my eyes

I want to make a connection to you

I'm still sitting here waiting 

For you to justify my love for you 

It's so humiliating

I know I shouldn't make demands

It's been a while

Since I felt your prescensce

I've been given gifts 

Bless me Father for I have sinned

My confession is I feel the prescensce

Of the holy ghost

The holy spirit

Or I'm possessed

It's supernatural in nature

Nuture me Almighty

Feed me from your bosom

And forgive my perpetual petulance

I am a sinner

I'm trying my best