I am in love with Him!

I don't posses any answers. 

I boldly just live my life.

In glorious colors.

Instead of black and white.

There are so many flesh tones.

And so many textures and musical notes.

There is so much power in words.

There is very little in what I wrote.

I can say I'm a novice.

But I hear I should do better.

And know I truly don't.

There is no such thing as perfect.

I just go where I go.

I just wander and linger.

I revel and I'm clingy. 

I have no relationship.

I am single.

I am forthright.

I have misgivings.

And the only thing I have to do is- 

Talk about myself and my feelings.

I'm not that myopic.

I'm not bionic.

I'm not a machine.

I'm not a robot that cooks and cleans.

And I really don't have money.

I am blessed.

For I believe, God loves me.

Even if He didn't.

I wouldn't let go of my faith.

I pray every day.

I'm grateful for what he has given to me.

A heart and a mind to think.

Although my thoughts are corroded.

With torture and the days.

Of deep pain and hurt.

The belief in a Merciful God 

Is what I deserve.

I don't seek any husband.

I don't seek a lover or a thrill.

I will remain faithful to my God.

I am in love with Him still.

I want to get closer to Him.

And be the best I can be.

The best possible version of myself.

The best possible version of me-

Is when I am with Him.

And He is with me.

I know I am lacking in my craft.

I don't posses the superhero power.

To weave words so eloquently.

But I am the best possible version

Of myself when God is with me.

The best possible version of me-

Is when I am with Him.

And He is with me.

So I will remain faithful. 

And when I am horny he makes love to me.

He fills my heart with love songs.

And poems.

I am married to my faith and my belief.

I am married to my religion.

And you can't take that from me.

It's too much for you to conceive.

This is my immaculate conception.

It is my belief that to believe in God.

Makes you pregnant with love.

I carry it inside of me.

I feed it and tend to it.

And water and nurture it.

And watch it grow.

As I believe in The Holy Mother.

And Her Love for Her Son.

I watch the sun rise every day.

And my immaculate conception 

Is not the same.

I am pregnant with an idea.

And the more that I say.

Will be likely misinterpreted by evil doers.

Instead of acknowledging.

The way that I pray is to write prayers.

Or prayer- like hymns.

And I am in His presence.

I am in love with him.